diff --git a/translate/writing-poetry/01.md b/translate/writing-poetry/01.md
index 681749c..d2d301f 100644
--- a/translate/writing-poetry/01.md
+++ b/translate/writing-poetry/01.md
@@ -6,17 +6,22 @@ Poetry is one of the ways that people use the words and sounds of their language
#### Some things commonly found in poetry
-* Many figures of speech (see [Figures of Speech](../figs-intro/01.md)).
+* Many figures of speech (see [Figures of Speech](../figs-intro/01.md))
* Parallel lines (see [Parallelism](../figs-parallelism/01.md))
* Repetition of some or all of a line
-* Lines of similar length.
+* Lines of similar length
* Dramatic imagery
* Old words and expressions
* Different use of grammar, including
* incomplete sentences
* lack of connective words
* The same sound used at the end or at the beginning of two or more lines
- * "Twinkle, twinkle little star. How I wonder what you are." (from an English rhyme)
+ * Twinkle, twinkle little star,
+How I wonder what you are.
+Up above the world so high,
+Like a diamond in the sky. (from an English rhyme)
+
+Below there are examples from the Bible for all these except for the last one about using the same sounds. It would be difficult to show here how Hebrew uses repeated sounds in poetry.
#### Some places to look for poetry in your language
@@ -31,7 +36,7 @@ Elegant or fancy speech is similar to poetry in that it uses beautiful language,
### Reasons this is a translation issue:
-* Different languages use poetry for different things. If a poetic form would not communicate the same meaning in your language you may need to write it without the poetry.
+* Different languages use poetry for different things. If a certain poetic form would communicate a different meaning in your language, you may need to use a poetic from from you own language that would communicate the right meaning, or you may need to translate it without the poetry.
* In some languages, using poetry for a particular part of the Bible would make it much more powerful.
### Examples from the Bible
@@ -60,28 +65,26 @@ The example above repeats the phrases "give thanks" and "his covenant faithfulne
The example above has lines of similar length.
->They have sharpened their tongues like swords;
->they have aimed their arrows, bitter words,
-
->so that they may shoot from secret places at someone who is innocent;
+>They have sharpened their tongues like swords;
+>they have aimed their arrows, bitter words,
+>so that they may shoot from secret places at someone who is innocent;
>suddenly they shoot at him and fear nothing. (Psalms 64:3 ULB)
In the example above David uses dramatic imagery to show how dangerous his enemies' words are; their tongues are like swords and their words are like arrows.
->My soul also is very troubled.
->But you, Yahweh—how long will this continue?
-
->4 Return, Yahweh! rescue me.
+>My soul also is very troubled.
+>But you, Yahweh—how long will this continue?
+>Return, Yahweh! rescue me.
>Save me because of your covenant faithfulness! (Psalm 6:3-4 ULB)
-THe example above
+The example above uses grammar differently. The author interrupts his request for Yahweh to return and rescue him by asking how long his trouble will continue. Interrupting his request helps to show how distressed the author feels.
### Translation Strategies
If the style of poetry that is used in the source text would be natural and give the right meaning in your language, consider using it. If not, here are some other ways of translating it.
1. Translate the poetry using one of your styles of poetry.
-1. Translate the poetry using your style of elegant speech.
+1. Translate the poetry using one of your styles of elegant speech.
1. Translate the poetry using your style of ordinary speech.
If you use poetry it may be more beautiful.
@@ -96,16 +99,20 @@ If you use ordinary speech it may be more clear.
>But his delight is in the law of Yahweh,
>and on his law he meditates day and night.** (Psalm 1:1, 2 ULB)
-The following are examples of how people might translate Psalm 1:1,2.
-
-1. Translate the poetry using one of your styles of poetry. (The style in this example has words that sound similar at the end of each line.)
- * Happy is the person not encouraged to sin
-Disrespect for God he will not begin.
-To those who laugh at God, he is no kin
-God is his constant delight.
-He does what God says is right.
-He thinks of it all day and night.
+The following are examples of how people might translate Psalm 1:1, 2.
+1. Translate the poetry using one of your styles of poetry. (The style in this example uses rhythm and rhyme.)
+
+ * That man has perfect blessedness,
+who does not walk astray
+in counsel of ungodly men
+or stand in sinners way,
+Nor does he sit in scorner’s chair,
+but places his delight
+upon God’s law, and meditates
+on God’s law day and night.
+
+
1. Translate the poetry using your style of elegant speech.
* This is the kind of person who is truly blessed: the one who does not follow the advice of wicked people, or stop along the road to speak with sinners, or join the gathering of those who mock God. Rather he takes great joy in Yahweh's law, and he meditates on it day and night.